My uncle experienced a motorcycle crash about 2 1/2 weeks ago. Brain surgery, an induced coma and many tubes/probes stuck in his body have been some of the more recent experiences he has undergone.

The initial intensity of feelings and the weighty unknown made the first days seem slower, the world carefully pressing the brakes so as not to stop abruptly furthering injury to my uncle. He’s a well-loved man with many friends and a fiercely supportive family. None of his family lives in his town or even in his state anymore (actually cousins do, but not his kids or siblings), but at least two and upto six family members have been at the hospital daily. Friends send their love from the western states and even Hawaii. The also send food and make donations in his name. As I type this, I cringe a little at how clinical some of it sounds. I love my uncle. I don’t know him all that well, but I like him because he is someone you can’t help but like. He’s been up to visit us in our new city the most, bar my mom. There’s a teddy bearish quality about him, though hiding, albeit not too well, a mischievous man. I can imagine the grief and annoyance he caused his two younger sisters, my mother and aunt, as a boy. And, just as revealing, I’ve seen their devotion and love for him in their vigil at his bedside.

The doctors have not wanted to give too much hope. The brain is a tricky thing. Today, however, as he has been gradually weened out of his induced coma, there was seemingly good news about his brain activity and the expectation of him waking up as soon as they can get the medications right (i.e. stop doping him up too much). I hope it happens soon. I hope we get to welcome him back to the world.

Just how much of him will wake up is something we will find out then. The doctors have warned that, even if everything goes well, we won’t really know the full results of the trauma for a year. Recovery, medication, therapy… He’ll also have love, friendship and the strength of many whose lives he has touched over the years.

And so to take a moment to be selfish, I ask myself, what can be learned from this? Have I learned something? I imagine if this had happened to me I’d have a small close contingent of family and perhaps some friends, but not the magnitude of outpouring that my uncle has had. Have I let too many friendships fall to the wayside? Perhaps that is a fault of my character. Deep down I think sharing love and kindness is important, but often I find myself too weary to share these beyond my very close circle, and even then it is not always love and kindness I’m giving to those I love.